Tuesday, January 8, 2019

anxious butterflies

The anxiety colored butterflies have stopped flapping their wings as fast as they were. My body no longer feels the need to run when I am not at ease. Instead, I stand in the midst of the snow barefoot and remind myself that I'm fine. The butterflies are finding safe branches to rest on.

Those safe branches feel steady. They aren't going to move on their own. If they were to move it'd be by a force outside of their control. That, I am okay with. I will be still while things appear safe. Those butterflies will rest.

I am starting to walk upright again. There is less anxious movement and instead it's replaced with inclined feelings. It's as if the winter is layering the world with white fluff that is okay to fall into. The anxious butterflies are being put to sleep until spring and the bones in my body are awaken by a delicate chill.

It's going to be okay-- those anxiety colored butterflies are settling and will eventually be put to sleep.

The first paragraph was written from words that I wrote in my journal. The rest was inspired by those words. Anxiety is something we are all fighting. More and more I notice people sharing their battles with it. I just wanted to say that it's okay to feel anxious, it makes you human and you shouldn't feel ashamed of it. <3

- vanessa


  1. Happy to see this up! <3 Hope it's a read worth your time!

  2. It's so nice to see this hopeful + positive post when so many are always posting about sadness + darkness. Not that those kinds of posts aren't important (they are!); this one is just a nice reprieve, like drinking a nice cold glass of water. Even though things may be bad, they can almost always get better--and that's an important reminder. I'm glad things seem to be working out for you <3

    Eleanor | On the Other Side of Reality

  3. As someone who struggles daily with severe anxiety, this post means a lot to me. This past year was really hard for me and this blog just really means the world to me because it’s always so inspiring and encouraging. Thank you, Vanessa, for writing this piece. I relate to it on a number of levels and find it so inspiring. <3 <3 <3