Wednesday, January 30, 2019

watch your thoughts

words are a gift. not only that, words are a powerful gift.

words are weapons,
they are fire,
they are rocket fuel.

and as such they should be used wisely. they shouldn't be thrown around for fun, or deployed without a second thought. be careful not only of what you say to others, but be aware and careful of what you say to you talk to yourself. start there.

don't down-talk. not even playfully. not even as a joke. never mess around with that, it's way too important. acknowledge the good and the sacred within yourself and respect that by never, never talking yourself down.

words are important. what we say to ourselves is important, and not only that, but it shapes our future. this has always stuck with me:

“Watch your thoughts, they become words;
watch your words, they become actions;
watch your actions, they become habits;
watch your habits, they become character;
watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

few words are as true as these. if you do nothing else this year, bring a little more awareness to your words and how you use them to talk to yourself.

stay stoked!
Sunday, January 27, 2019

you're safe

I know it's hard sometimes.

when you're in the dark
all alone
and the world is closing in from all sides

worst of all, you're trapped in your mind
and your mind is even worse than the world
it's a prison, cold and echoing

but only if you let it fall away from your hands
away from your heart
away from the fire in your soul that lit your eyes up as a child


and now I know you want to
go away
get away
from it

but don't

even when it's dark and cold and echoing—

capture your mind
hold it in your trembling hands
whisper the truth even through the dark

you are not alone
you are not alone

you are safe.

there is a presence, soft and comforting
close your eyes and breathe
you can feel it
wrapping you up like a hug
like strong and careful arms

you are not alone

the darkness is not tangible
only an absence of the light

close your eyes and
don't think.
just feel.

feel that you are not alone
b r e a t h e

you're safe.

it's okay to be scared sometimes. 
but remember that you are greater than any fear.

- abbie

Thursday, January 24, 2019


Watching myself change is captivating.

I’ve seen my mood change
my outlook

I have seen the bad days turn into sunshine
and then
the sunshine be taken away by something

It’s almost scary how fast I change
One minute I feel like myself
the next I don’t know the soul in the body

Friday, January 11, 2019


Today, you are free to be a parent to yourself.

No matter who your parents were to you--

Whether they cherished you and saw you as the pearl that you are,

Or whether they never truly saw you,

Whether they became a foundation on which you built a strong, secure soul,

Or whether they offered you nothing to work with,

Whether they championed your push into the unknowns of growing older,

Or whether they pushed you into it without a champion,

Trust me.
They were only giving you what they had in themselves to give.

The Father is giving you permission to embrace yourself with His mother-father heart.

You can hold the little one within yourself, crying without relief, and know that you are holding that child with a never-ending, never-lacking, always-there, Love.

He is there.
Tuesday, January 8, 2019

anxious butterflies

The anxiety colored butterflies have stopped flapping their wings as fast as they were. My body no longer feels the need to run when I am not at ease. Instead, I stand in the midst of the snow barefoot and remind myself that I'm fine. The butterflies are finding safe branches to rest on.

Those safe branches feel steady. They aren't going to move on their own. If they were to move it'd be by a force outside of their control. That, I am okay with. I will be still while things appear safe. Those butterflies will rest.

I am starting to walk upright again. There is less anxious movement and instead it's replaced with inclined feelings. It's as if the winter is layering the world with white fluff that is okay to fall into. The anxious butterflies are being put to sleep until spring and the bones in my body are awaken by a delicate chill.

It's going to be okay-- those anxiety colored butterflies are settling and will eventually be put to sleep.

The first paragraph was written from words that I wrote in my journal. The rest was inspired by those words. Anxiety is something we are all fighting. More and more I notice people sharing their battles with it. I just wanted to say that it's okay to feel anxious, it makes you human and you shouldn't feel ashamed of it. <3

- vanessa